Our Lord Jesus Christ, the King

Our Lord Jesus Christ, the King
Thou art the King of Glory, O Lord Jesus Christ; when Thou didst take upon Thee to deliver man, Thou didst not abhor the Virgin's Womb

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Struggling with Sloth, both Spiritual and Temporal

Mommy always told me how much God hates laziness and often when I read the Scriptures, I see things that exhibit perseverence and such and there's no question that the Saints fought to persevere thoughout their lives.

It seems I can hardly persevere for a week...  Last week I went through hell to get my financial aid worked out and meet with my advisor so that I could register for classes (a week after they had already started), and already I'm skipping.  I just don't have the motivation anymore and I'm losing interest in school.  I've read a lot of articles recently about how having a degree doesn't necessarily make finding good employment easier.  Also, my GPA isn't exactly consistent or impressive.  Everyone else just seems more "on the ball" than I am.

On the spiritual end, my prayer life has sorta taken a beating.  Yes, I still go to Sunday Mass and Daily Mass as well, but I've fallen into acedia by not feeding myself spiritually like I used to.  I'm definitely due for a Confession since the last time I went was during Christmastide.

I feel like skipping classes for no legitimate reason such as "not feeling up to it" or just "laziness" is mortally sinful because because clearly I reflected on it, clearly it is in violation of at least the Fourth Commandment, and lastly, I consented to it and even made a habit of it.  Also, it's wasteful and the less you go, the less you want to go, the harder it is to catch up, and then fiascos happen like when I first came to this school a few years ago. 

A good Catholic respects the duties of his or her state in life and being a student is a state in life.  A good Catholic also feeds his or her soul through prayer and meditation (I miss my daily Rosary).  I have prayed for perseverence, but I feel as if I'm missing something as I was kinda expecting that God would just plant in me this huge drive and that the next day, I'd be so hasty and ready to go to class or work or meetings, etc without having to contemplate it much... 


No comments:

Post a Comment